Sunday, March 29, 2009

Gloomy Day, Gloomy Outlook

I woke up in the dark again. Not that it was so early, as it was just after 6 a.m. Since we went to daylight savings time, I always wake up in the dark, not just when I get up early to go to the gym. I suppose by the time I come to terms with daylight savings time for this year, it will be time to switch back. Actually, that isn't true but I find this time of the year particularly trying. Dark too late, too much wind, too much variability in the weather, too much of too much. We had warm weather and sun earlier in the week and today we had snow, although it was only a small amount and is gone now.

I find that it is easier if somewhat less personal to blog every day using Plinky, although it messes up my carefully done settings for "read more." And in a sense it makes me lazy since I don't have to come up with something to write about, just write about the topic set for me. Plinky can make my writing somewhat formulaic although you can do a variety of things with almost any prompt. So far I am having fun with it, although I refused to write about zombies. Sometimes I feel humorous and sometimes not.

Everyone seems to be willing to work on stuff except me. All my bike friends are working on worthy projects and I am writing this indulgent and self-serving little piece rather than doing something of social significance or something of scholarly significance or just getting the old magazines read and out of the house. The only constructive thing I did was to stop complaining about the FM programming on WILL on Sunday afternoons and put on a CD instead. It isn't as if I don't have music to listen to when the radio isn't playing things I like. So while Garrison Keillor fans are listening to A Prairie Home Companion for their first or second time this weekend, I am listening to a mass by Orlando de Lassus and enjoying it very much.

If that is the case, why am I gloomy. Partly because I have had days on end of doing nothing productive. I haven't been reading, writing, knitting, or anything. I have watched some movies and spent a lot of time on Facebook. I haven't worked on my Italian or my French or ridden my bike on the few days when that might have been an option. I haven't even been able to spend money when I had it to spend.

Can I list accomplishments? They are meager but good. I reconnected with an old friend. That was the best. One that might turn out good was to join Sisters in Crime in hopes of restarting what was supposed to be a career as a mystery novelist. I had aspirations once. A new Facebook friend suggested joining and being part of a group of unpublished writers. This may be just what I need. I also cleared a lot old attachments out of my computer. I have stuff from years ago that were just junk. Eventually all the stuff from my working days that no longer has relevance to my current life will disappear from my computer. Some of it is in multiples having moved from computer to computer to computer over the years and some of it can no longer be read.

Maybe when my sinuses stop bothering me, my ear doesn't feel plugged, I finish writing about Arthur, Lord Lisle, I have my presentation on the Venetian ghetto complete, and the sun is shining and the temperatures moderate I will feel less gloomy. Then again, maybe not. But I would like to think that as spring becomes more springlike, my mood will improve and my projects will seem more desirable and less like burdens to be avoided for as long as possible.

No comments:

Post a Comment